Fear of losing someone I love

Photo by Rhodi Lopez on Unsplash

Working with fears is a moment to make space for what wants to be acknowledged. When we acknowledge things we change from resistance to acceptance and going direction love.

To vibrate in high frequencies is not to avoid your fears. It is to love them and see what they really are. Presents and gateways to find what is real.

In this spirit today I want to talk about fear of loosing someone we love. Again something triggered by the worlds pandemic lock down, but it’s one of those basic fears that we all know to some extend.

When I look into the fear of loosing someone I love I feel extreme emotional pain. I don’t even dare to fully get into the emotional pain of this.

And on the contrary when I go into the meditation philosophy, I can see that there is no way of really loosing anyone or anything, it’s simply the way how we created meaning and concepts for live.

So how to merge the two in a healthy way?

When I think about the worst lose of all it’s of course my children and my husband. The ones closest to me. Now my husband is the one that supports me through every situation and is very very important.

My children are the ones that would be soooo painful to loose, and my brain reasons with, because they are not meant to die before me. This is a “concept” and it’s ok to acknowledge this.

Now the general fear of loosing someone comes from the concept we have about death. And yes, here we go into belief options. For me it was always non understandable that there is death as in none existing anymore. I remember asking myself as a child when I first was told about someone who died, what does that mean…..

For me the answer, that they are just gone and don’t exist anymore was to abstract, I couldn’t comprehend and I still can’t.

So I live in a comprehension that there is nothing of essence ever distroid, it’s just always changing. So if I am within that truth I know that no one who died has been lost forever, but I can’t met the person physically anymore.

When I dream I have no problem with meeting the dead ones. They are all still there in all time lines. And dreaming often seams the more complex reality , than the small theatre play of day time live.

But what to do with the enormous fear and pain and grieve? Well, for a start as all emotions it needs respect and validation. It is totally ok and shall not be quietened down with reason of knowing it all better. Staying in touch with the pain till it calms down is like staying with a crying child till it has fallen asleep. Nurturing, ensuring, progressing, integrating…..

Loosing someone you love is real and an illusion. You have lost them and there is grieve and there is nothing you can do to change this but to stay present with yourself in love for every step that is coming now. There is no short cut and there is meaning to the experience of loosing someone.

If we would not know the pain, we would not be able to recognise the truth, the light side of things, that we infinitely love the other, as the other is also us and we are also the other.

Published by Melanie

I love to create and hold safe spaces that allow us to explore the depth of our beings. I do this on the physical level at our homes in Portugal as well as in vibrational ways though being present with people during sessions online or in person. I am also an adventurous homey, that loves to live in and with nature, exploring and living alternatives ways of live, education, health and entertainment.

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